I HAVE IDEAS I WANT TO GET DONE LIFE

Me, two weeks ago: ok i’m going to sit down and do something for Doc’s birthday!
Life: aha, what? you made plans? Nah, here have some shit to do
Me: ok well….I’ll just do it on the weekend!
Life: you fool, you have TWO BIRTHDAYS and your sister’s ANNIVERSARY to celebrate!! good luck!!!!
Me: ok…….well….I’ll just do it…over the next week then
Life: hmm. hm. hmmmmmmm. no.
Me: well I hate you but whatever, I still have the weekend.
Life: the weekend? haven’t you learned? that’s when shit happens! That’s when people randomly come over and stay for like three hundred hours so goooooood luuuuuuck
Me: f u c k