faelapis:

i think some of the jokes in the conversations between smoky and sardonyx were intentionally awkward or ill-timed. i mean. smoky laughs about the crowd being easy to please, for a reason. 

“i’m so excited i could just shatter!”

we’ve just had a bunch of episodes dedicated to the topic of shattering. how it means gems can never come back, how steven thinks nobody deserves that, how it changed the war, and how pink diamond deeply affected characters like jasper and eyeball.

“she (jasper) lost her mind in a corrupted fusion… i guess you could say she had a short fuse!” 

again, making light of a horrible thing that just happened… but i don’t think the writers think anyone found jasper’s corruption funny. heck, even people who dislike her (mostly) agree it wasn’t a pleasant scene. smoky doesn’t look all that comfortable making these jokes either.

but it segways into the real topic of the episode – how people use jokes to cover up very genuine problems. 

oftentimes, it’s awkward or flat-out uncomfortable to listen to, but for many people doing it, it’s also a way of coping. they want to acknowledge these bad things, but they don’t wanna… make a big deal out of it. they need to talk about them, but they also kinda really don’t want to. 

and that’s smoky.

trying their best to make light of their insecurities, because they don’t want to address them, or they don’t think that’s what their loved ones (sardonyx) wants to hear.  it’s kind of like having fun with a friend, while also going through something awful. you might want to talk about it, but you don’t really wanna… bring up how horrible you’re feeling when your friend is having a good time. you just wanna put on a “good show”.

so smoky starts making jokes about themselves. they’re not particularly clever or funny, they’re just “lighthearted” ways of saying they have serious issues. 

“i guess zero plus zero equals… zero!”

“they say two wrongs don’t make a right, i guess i’m living proof that’s true!”

these “jokes” aren’t funny, they’re sad. and sardonyx, who is excited for them and loves them, recognizes this and starts getting visibly uncomfortable. 

not everything can be a laughing matter. 

i think sardonyx recognized fairly early that smoky had self-confidence issues. like many friends and family do, her response was to try to help smoky find their positive traits… but when that doesn’t work, it can make the person you’re trying to comfort feel worse. like they’re a disappointment on top of everything else, for not following the “script” by feeling better already.

it was well-intentioned. it was the only way sardonyx knew how to address it, while also keeping a positive and fun mood. trying to cheer smoky up, without interrupting the “show”. 

but sometimes, you gotta interrupt the show and talk about what’s bothering you. even if it means ruining the good mood, disappointing the metaphorical “audience” that exists when you make your behavior performative to please someone else. 

steven, amethyst and smoky aren’t totally there yet… but, despite the joking tone, i think they’re closer to telling garnet and pearl about their issues. it’s an important step, and hopefully, they’ll be able to really talk about this soon, without putting on a show.